Ice Ages

Where are the snow plows and sidewalk shovelers in this city? MIA, apparently. Well, I should be familiar with this by now; it's the 3rd time I've experienced a Berlin winter (though the first one was just a week during my audition). It's always the same: no one clears the snow. Then it melts and is just plain wet and slushy, until the slush freezes. Then it's simply dangerous because the whole city is iced over. And in the words of little Joelle, the 3 1/2 year old I teach English to, it's very "slippy." I haven't fallen yet, but I sure do slide around a lot and lose my balance more than I'd like to. It's just a matter of time before I take a nose dive and get to know the sidewalk personally.

I had a nice evening with my former bible study leader Petra and one of the other girls tonight. We met at Petra's house and had "Abendbrot" with her British husband and 1 1/2 yr. old son. Abendbrot is a typical German dinner which is just bread with butter or a spread, like paprika or herb, and cheese, meat, or spreadable tea wursts, etc. Then we three girls had a nice chat.

I filled them in on the current state of my situation here and what the near future holds as far as when I'm graduating, etc. If I finish as planned, after the 2 years, that will be this coming July, 2006, after which I'd be coming home. I have a student visa which means I'm only allowed to stay for as long as I'm a student here.

Something common most students do, however, is take one or 2 "vacation semesters." The time you are allowed to study at one institution is sometimes strictly regulated and at my music school, it's a total of 8 semesters for oboe, and I entered in the 5th semester. By taking a vacation semester (2 are allowed), it just means you "win" a little time by being enrolled but concentrate mostly on practicing rather than taking classes. In the case of foreign students, it can also mean for a lengthened visa. For example, if I take this coming semester as a vacation semester, I will do my 8th and final semester in the fall. The whole time I will be considered a full-time student, so I will be able to have my student visa lengthened with no problem.

For me, taking a vacation semester would mean having time to prepare my graduation recitals, one solo and one chamber music, stress-free, and then perform them at the beginning of next semester, finishing everything before Christmas. I could also use the time to help solidify the changes I've made here musically in order to feel prepared for taking auditions for jobs.

Unfortunately living here is not free and I am not earning enough from my English-teaching jobs to fully support myself. Plus, I have a small pile of loans from home that need to be paid off. So that basically means if things continue the way they are financially, I will have to finish as planned this July and return home. But the question is if there is another option. Truthfully, I'd like the time here to be able to prepare my recitals slowly and relaxed. I also think I'd like to stay in Berlin a little bit longer.

Today when I took the train to the other family's house to play with the kids in English, I mentioned leaving in July to the mom, Birgit. She got all panicky that I was leaving soon, and I reminded her that it will have been 2 years, like I told her from the beginning. I also explained the financial situation and she had an idea of her own: for me to move in with them and become an sort of "on-call" nanny for when the kids got sick so she didn't have to miss work.

As good and as generous as an offer as it was, I am not sure that with my schedule as it is, I am not free to be a nanny, or au pair, but she told me not to worry - the kids would be in "kindergarten," or daycare, all day and she'd still come home from work in the afternoon to pick them up. I'd just live there and take the kids when they were sick or she was on a business trip. She insisted that it would work - I wouldn't have to pay for rent or living expenses and could take the office upstairs for my room. So while I am considering it, I really don't know if it can work because I don't have the flexibility to stay at home all day if I have an orchestra rehearsal or an oboe lesson or class. I get along great with the mom and the kids are fun and cute (ages 3 and 5). Anyway, I will think about the offer and continue to see what other options might become available to make it financially possible to stay in Berlin.

If I finish in July I won't be flying home in March. Not only will I be home soon enough after that anyway, I will really use the time to practice without distractions for my recitals. The only thing is, there are a couple auditions I wanted to take in March in the States. So this doesn't get any easier!

But life is good because I know that I don't have to worry because I know God is in control. He has my life mapped out and knows where there's a job and location for me, wherever they might be, and the route to get there. And also because I got my hair cut on Sat. and don't hate my hair anymore! The last cut was just so annoying to work with. Even when it grew out, it was still way too layered which made it just look messy. I'd been waiting for it to grow out enough to get the bottom layer cut, making the other layers less drastic.

I went back with my tail between my legs to my trusty hair stylist in my old neighborhood to fix it for me. I'd wanted to try a couple of the interesting salons downtown, which is where I got my hair cut the past 2 times, but realized there is nothing like a dependable stylist to correct a hair cut gone bad. She was pretty disappointed by the cut as well and promised to make it better. And she did, as well as giving me some nice highlights. So now I can finally wear my hair down without being annoyed anymore. See, life is good! :)